Hello,
I am DrShitpostJr, world renown surgeon, doctor, and winner of a Nobel Peace Prize. Lately I have noticed a spike in shitposts and have been researching to find the culprit of such. Today I am here to announce my findings and how this subreddit will be officially labeled as a 'shitpost paradise' based on these findings.
The search began a few days ago when I noticed the winds of shit and the incoming shitstorm on the horizon. I looked outside my laboratory and knew something was happening: there had been a sudden and dramatic spike in shitposts. You could compare this to global warming - as shitposts increase, so do shitstorms. The storm came barreling toward my laboratory and with my radar I have been able to track the storms origins to this particular subreddit.
Granted, I know nothing about professional basketball. I only have ever played curling and was one of the worst in the sport because I was dedicated to achieving my goal of becoming a doctor in shitposting. When I first came to this subreddit I was greeted my miles of shit. Glorious shit. I brought my RV here and made this shitposting paradise my home as I continued my research.
I concluded my research a few moments ago. Upon further review, this is a glorious and wonderful shitposting paradise. Other subreddifs for NBA teams are filled with either salty fans who are pissed about their shitty team losing or fans that take basketball too seriously and question everything about their team. This subreddit averages a shitpost an hour (also known as sp/hr), well above the other NBA teams subreddit average and very close to the highest average I have seen in my 40+ years of research. Because of this, the Hawks subreddit will be officially labeled in the National Shitposting and Shitposters Database of Relevance (NSPaSPDoR) as a shitposting paradise.
Wear this title with honor. Thank you for bringing shitposting to such great heights. I will continue to inhabit this subreddit and will report back if I find anything new to report on.
Sincerely,
Dr. Shitpost Jr.
PhD Shitposting, MD General Studies and Women's Studies
Submitted January 16, 2017 at 07:06PM by DrShitpostJr